Q&A Episode – answering your burning questions

Podcast Episode 6

Ladies, this is episode number six of the Anna Bey Podcast and I am Anna Bey, as many of you know by now. So ladies, I know that last week this episode was supposed to come out. The Q&A podcast episode which is going to happen today instead. But what happened last week? Why didn’t I publish anything? Let me tell you one thing, when mercury retrograde happens I can definitely feel it. Wait, I think it’s mercury retrograde right now. A lot of things were going wrong on the technical aspect so it actually forced us to postpone the podcast episode until this week. For those of you who are following me on Instagram … And you should. My Instagram is @annabey Many of you probably have seen that I am in Turkey. I am here on a work trip with my team. And we had really bad weather when I was recording this podcast episode last week to the point that I actually had to stop the recording and continuing it later once the bad weather has stopped. It was truly thundering so loud that I thought it was pretty much the apocalypse happening. 

So when I continued to record, then we started having technical issues. I lost parts of the recording that I had recorded and to the point that I was not able to finish the recoding. And you are going to notice that in today’s podcast episode because you’re going to hear that I have recorded at different times. So the sound was also a little bit off during one part of the recording. It has just been a total mess to be quite honest with you. But unfortunately that’s what happens in life sometimes. But this made us delayed with all the bad weather, all the technical issues and also losing parts of the podcast. So I actually had to find a time in our very hectic schedule, as we are currently not at home, we are still in Turkey, to find a moment to finish the recoding which is basically what I’ve done for today. So please bear with the fact that this recording is going to be a little bit of bits and pieces from this and that, but I really wanted to answer your questions that you asked me on my Instagram story on my School Of Affluence account. 

Now, before I start with the Q&A, I want to also tell you about next week. I am going to actually do the podcast episode about my trip to Turkey. And I can tell you one thing ladies, for those of you who are more interested in kind of jet setting and used to read my blog, Jetset Babe, I can tell you that next week’s episode is definitely going to be interesting because I have some really good intel and insights to give you about Turkey. Stay tuned for that episode because I’m really going to give away a lot of gems and a lot of my own field research. So you don’t want to miss out on that because I have some interesting things to tell you. Let me tell you that. All right, ladies, let me start with the Q&A of this week. 

Q: how to stay slim/what do you eat in a day? 

A: And one thing that I really need to tell you is that I’m trying to really move away from content where it’s so much focused on the diet, what I eat, how much I weigh, exactly what I do. The reason for that is, I feel like it is so personal and so individual what we eat and what works for us that it just might not be applicable for everybody else. Surely I can tell you in loose senses, what I enjoy eating. Like I enjoy eating salads, healthy food, I enjoy eating fish and seafood a lot. I enjoy eating soups. One of my favorite dishes is to eat soup. I love eating fruits. I love vegetables. These are the type of things that I love eating. I haven’t always been like this. Back in the days I used to eat quite unhealthy but I used to also be bigger as a result. Then I decided to do a lifestyle change which was maybe not so easy in the beginning but after a while when your body and your taste buds get used to a different type of cuisine and food and of course things like vegetables … Before one could be very like look at a broccoli and feel like that’s so disgusting. But now I adore broccoli because my taste buds have changed because I did this lifestyle change. 

So that’s something that is kind of part of my life. But this doesn’t mean that I’m all the time super slim, super healthy. Not at all. As a matter of fact, my trip to Greece, I actually ended up putting on some weight there because the Greek food is so rich but so good that it made me gain weight. But I’m actually not stressing so much about weight gain and weight loss anymore. And that’s thanks to intuitive eating that I started with last year. And since I started intuitive eating I’ve became much more kinder to myself and my body and my view on diet and health. And I also want to really not feel that oh, if I gain weight that I should feel bad about it. I see weight gain as a natural part of life to be honest because it’s like with seasons, we fluctuate. And I’m not talking about yo-yo dieting now by the way. Not at all. I’m talking about that as with seasons it’s normal to sometimes be a little bit bigger and sometimes be a little bit smaller. But I’m not talking about dramatic differences now, because I don’t think that’s particularly healthy. I’m sure it’s not. 

But I’m talking like, if you are in a phase in your life when let’s say you are enjoying life a lot so it’s normal, you put on a little bit of weight during that time versus when you were in a different phase of your life when you were maybe really focused on other things that you might lose a bit of weight. Who knows? But one thing that I felt is important for me is that I don’t want to push out there of this is how you have to be eating and this and that. And I think that changed a lot for me since I started intuitive eating because I really think everybody should learn and listen to their own body and its needs. But it’s easier said than done. And this doesn’t mean that you should just go out and do it and think that you’re doing it right. You actually need some training on how to properly listen to your body. And that’s why I kept recommending books on intuitive eating, mindful eating and I’m sure there are also coaches for this and even therapists for this. I think everybody who might suffer from disordered eating or have a very difficult relationship with food and diets, et cetera might be worth looking into this. 

So I don’t want to give any advice on how to stay slim. Although, my personal opinion is that I do think it’s important to be healthy. I think that should be prioritized by every individual out there. But being healthy does not have to be being slim. We all have different body composition. We all have different genetics. Some people simply don’t have the genetic code of being slim. But I do still think though that if you are living a healthy life and you are eating healthy, you’re eating balanced, then you are going to see your body looking healthy. And that’s what I think is important. I think it’s important to look healthy rather than looking, let’s say slim or skinny. And just as a last note on this. So as an example, I have gained some weight now and I’m actually absolutely fine with the weight gain. I would say maybe I’ve gained four kilos which is quite a lot for my type of body composition. Like usually I wear dress size XS, now it’s difficult for me to wear XS. Now I’m S. And again, it’s not a big thing, it’s not a big deal. Let’s not be obsessed what size in clothing we are. 

But you know what, I’m actually very happy that for once in my life I feel good gaining weight. Because I don’t feel like it’s that important for me. I feel like I know that this weight is going to anyway go away because as soon as I’m back to my usual routine which is, I have a specific routine because I enjoy it and because it makes me feel good, then I know those kilos are going to go away by themselves so I don’t have to become upset over my weight gain or obsess over my weight gain. It’s okay. I have my routine that I know works and that routine is always going to make me look healthy and feel healthy when I stick to it. So just as an FYI, if anybody else feel panicky because you’ve gained weight for some reason, just focus on your routine and you’ll be fine. 

Q: How did you decide which part of your life you decided not to trade for content?

A:So, this person is I think referring to when I mentioned in my story not so long ago that my relationship is so sacred for me which is why it doesn’t matter … How can I say? How much I would rise in popularity if I would start showcasing my relationship and my love life and my home life for my audience because I know for a fact that that’s what people really want to see. I understand that people are curious and I also do see influencers who do showcase that side of their life that of course they have faster growth, et cetera. But I just know that for me, my home life, my relationship life, my family life, for me personally it’s the most sacred thing that I have in my life truly. And it will never ever be worth for me to trade that for content. It’s like me selling that part out of my life if that makes sense. Because I could make loads of more money if I just put all of that on display, right? But I really don’t want to. Because I know from experience but also from what I’ve seen with other people, how dangerous and how difficult that can be. 

And I’m not saying that every influencer who is a family influencer or a relationship influencer or anything like that, couples influencers, that something bad happens to them or they are not doing it well. Not at all. It’s really just my own preference. And I think it’s important to understand what parts of your life are just sacred and private for you. And for me that’s the most private for me. Like I can show a bit of my day to day life, I don’t mind that. But if I would have a camera every angle of my life or show really every single bit of my day, I’m not sure I would be a happy person. But I’m just talking about myself. I am somebody who requires some privacy and definitely a family life and home life is my private area. It’s my sacred area. To some degree also friends. So I only showcase parts of my friend circle. I don’t put everybody there on display, plus not everybody wants to be there on display. 

So that’s also a different element that I try and keep as private as possible, even though I show a little bit of glimpses to my audience. Because of course, it is important for me to also connect with my audience and make them feel connected to me. But there has to be boundaries set in place. And that’s where I personally feel like right now I have found a balance for myself where I showcase parts of my life but I don’t show everything. If you think about it I actually don’t even show that much. But it’s important for me to keep it like this. And I also think that my audience really does understand this and really does respect this. Because when you have a very healthy or a very balanced kind of public life/private life balance, then you can do this job for far longer and then also don’t really burnout the same way. I have another element. 

I’m sure those of you who follow me on Instagram stories, you probably also noticed that from time to time or definitely every month or every two, three weeks, I disappear for a few days and it’s fully normal. It’s part of my routine because there are days where I just feel like okay, I don’t feel like I have anything to say, I feel a little bit bored of posting things. That means I need to take a quick timeout to get that inspiration again and get the creativity back. To just reboot, detox a little bit and come back. So that’s something that I do and it really works well for me. And I just think that everybody who … Even if you are influencer or if you’re not an influencer, you just have to find your own little technique what works best for you. But it’s really about finding that balance that works for you. And I feel personally that I have found mine. 

Okay, this is actually something similar to the question that was asked now. But this is a question that came in two parts.

Q: I know you believe in not showing your boyfriend in social media. Can you give advice for those of us who already did it? I really want to become more private about my partner. Is it possible to make amends?

A: I mean absolutely. You just stop posting him. It’s that easy. Obviously people will start speculating whether you broke up or not but I personally think, let people speculate. It’s kind of  fun actually. Especially when you are the one who’s knows what’s really the reality and really what’s true. So I wouldn’t really be too concerned about, oh, is it too late? No. It’s never too late. You just stop posting him as of today and start living your life more private. It’s fine if you already posted him. Like in the beginning when I started my social media, I think when I had around maybe 10,000 followers or even less, I was posting my partner. Not too much but a little bit. And then I decided you know what, I don’t want to do this anymore and I just stopped. And even though there are people who have seen him, how he looks like, that doesn’t really matter to me. 

The most important is, what happens today? And the fact that I’m keeping relationship private is what really matters to me today. And yeah, you can do it too. 

Q: something about anxiety and your experience if you feel like talking about it.

A: So I’m not sure exactly what the question is but definitely anxiety is one of those really big subjects because everybody experience anxiety and it’s a natural thing for humans to also feel. Especially in our society today, the way it’s built in our climate as well. We are going to experience anxiety. Whether it is from stress, let’s say work stress or, I don’t know, love life stress, emotional stress or simple other forms of anxiety. People even have more sever anxiety, people have panic attacks. There are so many different … Anxiety is one big massive subject and I definitely do want to talk more about it actually in depth and maybe on its own podcast episode. Because I am just like every other human out there. I also experience anxiety but I have my tools for anxiety so that anxiety does not start controlling my life or I feel like I’m powerless or around it or any like that. I have now created my own toolkit of how to manoeuvre anxiety. Which is why I love cardio and especially running. It really helps me with the management of anxiety because it just keeps it at bay if I can say so. 

Then I also really think about what I eat and drink. I love drinking wine as an example. But I really need to be mindful not to drink wine too often because wine, or actually alcohol in general, can definitely give me anxiety when I drink it too often. So that’s one. Then you have environmental anxiety that I also feel. Like I can have anxiety over things that’s happening in the word, et cetera, et cetera. And sometimes you also have anxiety because of things that just happens in your life. Sometimes there are things that happen in your life that you don’t even understand that give you anxiety. But it just triggers your subconscious and gives you anxiety. So I make sure that I have my routine of healthy living. Eating healthy. I mean I know this all sounds so cliché but truly ladies don’t switch off your ears just yet. Honestly if I eat healthy I know my body gets nutrients to keep me balanced. If I exercise … Doesn’t happen all the time by the way. But if I exercise it really does keep anxiety away. It’s like if you eat one green apple a day, keeps the doctor away. Truly, it’s the same thing with cardio and exercise. For me I’m saying. I’m not saying it’s like this for everybody and I know people might feel harsher anxiety that just doesn’t go away with exercise. My anxiety usually does. 

Then the biggest cliché of them all, but let’s talk about it. Eight hours of sleep. Oh my does that help for anxiety. When you have regular sleeping pattern, when you don’t go to bed too late and when you wake up early. I mean I don’t know if you ladies feel the same, but for me, I feel depressed if I wake up after 8 p.m. Or sorry, 8 a.m. I need to wake up around six, seven and then I feel good. It’s something about the morning energy that I need to kind of, I don’t know, tune into or something like that. And that helps me feel balanced and it gives a lot to my psyche. Kind of the morning energy. Here in Turkey … Because I know that the climate here is a bit warmer than in Switzerland. And right now I’m just waking up every morning and the first thing I do is to step outside on the terrace and just sit in the stillness of the early morning and listen to the nature sounds of early morning. Birds are singing, trees are moving. You can hear the wind through the leaves. And that makes wonders for my wellbeing and it also helps reducing the anxiety as a result. 

So that’s a few things that really helps me with anxiety. To be honest with you, I’m going to be fully transparent. I developed a toolbox for myself in therapy. And this toolbox is nothing more than just kind of me knowing what helps me … Kind of what helps me prevent anxiety from the beginning from before it even happens. And number two, what helps me reduce anxiety once anxiety kicks in. And I have actually made a long list of all the things that I know in my life or in life in general that I know just works for me. This is why I want to do a separate episode about anxiety and kind of my technique for it. But just before I finish answering this question … So I have this long list of things and some of those things are for instance journaling helps me a lot. Going out in nature, going for a power walk, sitting and just listening to nature sounds in nature. Like if you were sitting on the beach just listening to the sound of the water. So calming, so soothing and makes me feel grounded and really reduces my anxiety. 

Or if I’m in the forest just listening to the trees and how the leaves move and the birds and that also is very soothing for me and helps me just to ground myself. And when I say ground myself that’s what I mean. When I ground myself it reduces the anxiety or it prevents the anxiety from flaring up in the very beginning. So you need to find your methods. But okay, if you ladies want to hear more on the subject, because I can truly talk a lot on the subject and I am going to record a separate episode for this because I have so much to tell you on this subject. Obviously because I’ve gone through this and this is something I work with regularly and of course I’ve also worked on it a lot in therapy so it’s a big part of a human’s life to understand anxiety and how to cope with it. So I do think that it could be perhaps a good episode.

Q: Do you use fake tan? What product do you use and do you consider it classy or elegant to tan?

A: I have definitely used fake tan in my life for sure. One thing though I must tell you that I’ve not really used much tanning beds in my life and I can tell you one thing is that, definitely don’t do tanning bed. That is like one of the worst things you can do for skin cancer and damaging your skin. So that’s something I never did, but actually you know why I never did it? I mean besides because it’s so dangerous. I also don’t like the tan tanning beds give you. It doesn’t look like the tan you get from the sun so that’s kind of my reason. So yes, for that reason I actually did fake tan from time to time. But let me tell you one thing, that I actually stopped with fake tan too pretty much. Not necessarily because of let’s say if it’s bad for your health or anything like that. I mean, I don’t know. I’m sure it’s never good to apply a bunch of chemicals on your skin. However, I think that we live in such a chemical society already that it’s just not going to be worse than anything else that we already do. 

But I personally just think spray tan or fake tan is so inconvenient. It doesn’t matter how many new products come up in the market, you’re still going to have the patches, you are still going to have the marks on your bed when it peels off, you look all patchy. And I don’t know ladies, I just feel like it’s too much of an inconvenience for me that I’d rather stay pale and enjoy my paleness, accept the fact that I’m pale. It’s just the way my complexion is. Plus, the smell and the color is not always very flattering. Some people can really get it right but since I am very light in my complexion, I easily look orange, plus the smell is not very nice. So yeah, I kind of stopped. I think I stopped probably when I started my relationship which was many years ago now. Before that I would definitely be doing spray tan or fake tan from time to time but I just don’t want to do it anymore. Maybe on the rare occasion I would do it but not something I do. So to answer your question, what products to use, I don’t know what’s the latest products. I used to like St.Tropez spray tan or a fake tan back in the days. And I still think that they’re quite decent. But that’s probably all I can tell you about that. 

Q: What do you use your iPad for? Do you use it for journaling?

A: Yes, I do actually use my iPad a lot for journaling. There is a great program called … I don’t remember. I have an Apple pen with my iPad and it’s such a great tool. I would say definitely I recommend everybody to get an Apple pen if you have an iPad because it’s so nice to kind of journal and you can even draw things and it just gives you that creativity. I also use my iPad a lot for reading my Kindle. Sometimes I like to have my Kindle in big format which my iPad pro is. It’s quite big. And then I also use it for, let’s say when I travel, I watch something on the plane on it or if I just want to watch something and I just want a small screen to watch. I’m not going to lie, I don’t use it that much, my iPad. But it’s there. 

Q: How was your experience having COVID?

A: I think this question would deserve a whole episode on its own because I feel like there is a lot to say on this subject. If there is of course enough requests for such an episode because obviously this topic is … I’m sure a lot of us are also tired about the COVID subject. But if people feel like, yeah, we might we be tired of it but we still want to hear your experience of COVID then of course I can record an episode like that. But just to kind of give you a quick answer, my experience was … I did not enjoy that experience. Even though I had mild symptoms I thought it was still a very frightening experience. And definitely it was one of the worst weeks of my life. Let’s put it this way. But that was more because of the anxiety around of COVID than me having to go to  any hospitals or anything like that. So I’m still lucky that I was able to get through it on a mild level but even with the mild symptoms that I had, they were still unpleasant. Let’s put it this way. But again, let me explain everything in a different episode if you ladies really want to know. 

Q: Do you have a driver’s license?

A: I do actually. I have a driver’s license since 2008. That was quite a long time ago. But I don’t drive. Almost never. To the point that I lost confidence in my ability and my skills of driving. I mean I do feel like I can drive well. I don’t think that I’m a bad driver of any sort. But I just don’t feel confident in traffic and in Geneva there are just so many rules on the road. I would say it’s a bit of a more tricky city to drive in so for this reason I haven’t been driving yet in Geneva. But I have been actually taking some driving lessons just to get used to the roads in Geneva. Because obviously cities and places are different to drive in. So we shall see. Maybe I will start driving soon. 

Q: Have you any app recommendations on online shopping?

A: Yes, I do have my apps that I shop from regularly and I’ve mentioned this a lot actually. I’ve become more of an online shopper these days than in person shopper because it just takes a longer time to go in stores and time is something that I feel has become a bit of a scarcity for me these days so I just feel like there isn’t enough time. So online shopping has therefore become my go to method because you can easily multitask. Let’s say you have to do a tedious task where you’re somewhere waiting, I don’t know, for a doctor’s appointment or something. You can quickly just create your wish list, check out what’s there in the stores and then you just decide and you pay and you get your stuff. So I feel like for me this has become my favorite method for shopping.

And the shops that I regularly visit are Outnet, Net-A-Porter, Matchesfashion, Mytheresa, and YOOX. Sometimes FARFETCH as well, depending if I’m looking for something very specific. But I would say my favorite would probably be … I like Mytheresa and Matchesfashion the most, most likely, because there you always find the sizing. I like Net-A-Porter but Net-A-Porter has less items and they also often run out of small sizes which is quite frustrating. So that’s why I like Mytheresa and Matchesfashion a lot because they usually have a lot of sizes. Then I also do have a big love for yoox.com because … For those of who are aware of this website, it’s also like a fashion outlet. But what I like about this site is you can find all kinds of random brands there and almost all of them are at least mid range. No, I would say all of them are pretty mid ranged in the app of course and then you also have designer items there. 

But I love YOOX in particularly for the mid range brands. The brands that I’ve never heard of. You see, I don’t really shop because of a brand or a designer. Sometimes I do but majority of the times I don’t. Majority of the times I know what I want, I know like a specific look that I’m after and at YOOX it’s so good because you always have a very good selection because they have so many brands and so much to choose from. So the chances are always higher. Let’s say I want to buy a long sleeved cardigan in the color pink. Now, the chance is much higher that I’m going to find something like this in YOOX than in the other shops because they have so many items. So that has kind of been my strategy and that’s how I’m actually able to find so many clothing. And then ladies ask me how I manage to find everything. Well, it’s all about just clever research and that’s pretty much my strategy. 

Q: Is there any food you don’t eat?

A: Well, there sure is. So let me give you some examples. I try to avoid eating onion and garlic, especially in raw form. So I wouldn’t eat raw onion and raw garlic of course. Even though I know of the health benefits and all of those things but I just don’t like it and I don’t like the smell of it. I can eat it sometimes when it’s cooked. That’s more okay. But not raw. I also eat very little meat and I cannot eat meat that’s on the bone. So I wouldn’t be able to eat like lamb chops or chicken legs or … What else do you have? Ribs for example.

I also don’t like so much steaks but I can eat it once in a blue moon but it’s not my preference in food. If there is any meat that I would like to eat then it would probably be something like a chicken breast or some mince meat or something like that but I wouldn’t eat much else to be honest with you. I think that’s the biggest thing that I don’t like to eat. Usually it’s like yeah, related to meat, animal products. But besides that I eat pretty much everything else I would say. I mean surely there are things that I like and enjoy less, et cetera. But yeah, spicy food I don’t like so much by the way. I could never understand how people can like spicy food but I guess it’s a very big cultural thing as well so that’s something that I am aware of. But for me it’s very difficult to eat that. 

Q: Where to find seamless undergarments?

A: I love the strapless skin colored bras from WonderBra. For my type of chest they just work so well and they’re very comfortable to wear. I don’t really like to wear bras with straps for two reasons. Number one, because I just find it very uncomfortable. I suffer from migraines and whenever I have pressure around my … What do you call it? Shoulder area. Sometimes I feel like it can affect my migraine situation in a negative way so that’s why I prefer just having my shoulders free from no pressure which is why I wear a lot of strapless bras. But if any migraine ladies out there have the same trick to avoid having a migraine trigger then let me know because I know this sounds pretty strange, but I just found that this works for me. Partly, I mean not always but yeah. Plus it really helps with clothing. And I understood when I saw my wardrobe the other day that I actually don’t have many clothes where I can wear regular bras with bra straps with. So for me I actually have to wear these type of bras most of the time to camouflage the straps. 

As underwear, because I wear a lot of white trousers I also need to wear only skin color and very seamless undergarments. So I usually buy mine from Chantelle which is a brand. They have really good ones. Actually, they’re even one size so they’re very soft. Perfect, seamless. Do not show underclothing so I can really recommend that. 

Q: How to stress less in everyday life. I’m always worried about everything and overthinking.

A: Well first of all, if you are worried about everything and overthinking then first of all you have to take control of your thoughts. And for me of course meditation helps but also just grounding yourself. Also working with mind control and trying to understand that what’s going on in your head oftentimes can be an illusion and we can’t trust everything our brain tells us either so it’s all about kind of stopping for a second and rethinking what’s really going on inside your head. And ask yourself, is it really, really true or not? And then allow yourself to be grounded this way. 

I also like to de-stress by taking a break. Meaning just sit down. Try and ground yourself. Maybe just close your eyes for a second. Breathe a little bit. Do a little bit of meditation. Even if it’s laying down meditation. Then I would also say that going for a walk in nature helps me so much. It’s like the nature’s energy just absorbs all stress from you and refills you with new kind of empowering energy I would say. So for me that helps to always do that as soon as I feel like okay, I’m hitting a limit now where I feel really stressed. Then I ground myself, I take a step back. I ground myself and I make sure I don’t go back to whatever activity it is that I was doing until I feel like I’m more grounded now. And for me personally I have to do this because one of the biggest reasons to why I get migraines is because of stress. So I need to all the time be wary of my stress levels because otherwise I might get a migraine.

Q: What are the best jobs to meet affluent men?

And I think that work is sometimes such an overlooked area of where you can meet a potential partner and especially if you want to meet a high level partner. So I know for a fact from all of the stories that I have heard, there are both kind of top level professions and there are also kind of more … What would you call it? Simple professions where you can meet a potential partner. Especially someone who is more affluent. I think air hostess is one of those. I just heard so many stories of how people have met on flights. Especially air hostess and I know a few. They tell me of course you do get loads of phone numbers and surely not all of them are going to be serious catches but you just never know. I also do think that it is important to work … Let’s say if you work in an office, to think about working in a male dominated environment. Because obviously you are going to be more exposed to men. Plus if you are one of the few women, you’re not going to have much competition in the office if you want to flirt around. And there are of course dos and don’ts whether you should be mixing work with your romantic life. 

So that is of course an individual decision but let’s be honest here, I think we all know that many couples have met through the work space. Every job that I personally worked in, you always have couples who work there together so I don’t necessarily think that that should be something taboo, I just think that it’s an opportunity. Working as well of course in offices … Let’s say if you work with lawyers or you work with finance, you are going to of course be exposed to the type of men that oftentimes ladies would enjoy meeting. So that could be a good idea. Whether if you work there as being on their level or if you maybe work their as a receptionist or something like that. But the big importance here is to just be exposed to them and to be in contact with them on a daily basis. Now, other jobs that I’ve also heard are also if you work with high end real estate. You have many clients where you show them … Let’s say if you are commercial spaces or you do real estate for residential spaces, that’s definitely a good option too. 

I also think anything like a hostess in a fine dining restaurant or in a trendy hotspot is also worth looking into. Imagine if who’s who of town, all of them go to this restaurant because it’s the best in town or it’s the trendiest in town. Of course you’re going to meet all these people and you just never know. And if you are somebody who have upgraded yourself, you look your best and you have a captivating energy around you, then you are going to draw attention to you. And that’s usually when people want to make a connection. 

Q: I miss some of your old content. Like how to join the jet set circuit. Can you talk about this?

A: So just to kind of explain one thing … Because I know that I have definitely transitioned from one niche to a different niche in the last few years. So for those of you who are kind of late to the party, I started off by blogging about high society, about kind of Jetset Babes and all of those things. Then I started School Of Affluence and I continued to talk about high society but I started to emerge more into elegance. Then I created my second course and that’s where I more went into the direction of elegance, personal development and of course, how to be a high level woman. Now, the reason to why I did this transition is because people who are interested in the very specific jet set circuit and Jetset Babes type of life, it’s a very, very small group. It’s very, very niche. The more my audience grew and the more I understood what my audience wanted, I understood that my audience wanted more than just that. So I had to kind of transition together with how my audience transitioned. 

Now, one things that’s always been very important for me, and that’s to always keep a red thread. So everything I teach today, even though it’s a little bit broader than when I started with my blog, Jetset Babe, it can really be applied to the kind of very specific niche. So as an example like how to join the jet set circuit. Well, if you just apply all the tips that I teach in my online finishing school and of course also in my program, Secrets of the Elite Woman, but also everything that I share in my free content, that is going to take you to the jet set circuit. The formula is really the same. It’s just a different type of community. But it all works the same in the end of the day. So my advice is to just listen to all my free content, take my course if you feel it’s the right fit for you, and then you have the answers there. But just to kind of give you some directions before I continue to the next questions, I would just say, go to the places where to these people go. Travel to the places where all the hotspots, all the hot travel goes to. It has been Mykonos, Ibiza, San-Tropez, that type of thing during summer. 

You basically have to go where they go because that’s how you get to know them if you are in the same locations as them. If you go to the same restaurant, bars, clubs, beach clubs, venues, parties, etc. That’s the whole formula. Like it’s not very complicated. And then what it’s all about is to really become sharp at networking. Because having access to the jet set circuit, it’s by being in the right place and getting to know the right people. And that’s all about you do the research of where to go and then you also become a good networker. And this is also why I keep talking about your network is your net worth and why I always include networking as a big part of my tuition. 

Q: what to wear inside the house.

I have had a video about how to look elegant at home. And the reason why I made a video with that title is because I think it’s really important to wear clothes at home that are comfortable but do not make you feel like a slob. The whole purpose of an elegant transformation is for us to feel like we are on top of our game 24/7. I mean of course whenever we want. Sometimes it’s fine to just be a slob if you want. But we are doing this as a method for bringing up our energy, staying on top with our energy and just feeling our best and therefore looking our best as a result. Because anyway, you have to wear something around the house. You can choose between rags or you can choose between riches. That’s why I would rather go for riches because it makes me feel better, it makes me feel good about myself and it puts me in a better mood. Again, even though we surely dress for other people too … Let’s not lie about that fact. But I do think we also dress for ourselves and particularly for our own kind of sensations about ourselves. 

So for example at home, if it’s wintertime or fall I would wear more, let’s say, soft trousers like wider trousers or even fitted trousers in a very nice pleasant material like cashmere blends, wool blends, maybe even some silk blends together with long sleeve. Maybe a log cardigan. In summer you can actually wear a nice linen dress. Maybe a wrap dress. Something that is comfortable but still keeps you cool. I don’t necessarily think that we should be wearing heels and really extravagant things at home because obviously those things usually are not as comfortable and I believe that it’s important to actually be comfortable at home. You are lounging around. You are putting your feet up on the sofa and things like that and maybe you’re doing some chores around the house so of course you want to be comfortable. But just try and think about what actually is nice looking clothes. Just avoid the cheap stuff. Avoid the old stuff. Avoid anything that you just feel like oh okay, this is not making me look my best. I want you to feel like a goddess at home and I want you to feel cozy at home. And whatever clothing that is for you, that’s the clothes you should wear. 

Q: Who is your camera person? Did you have to hire someone or does your fiance do all of it?

A: My camera person really depends. Most of the times I actually have somebody of my team who helps me with the footage. Like video or photo. I also hire a videographer or a photographer if let’s say, one of team members is not there or can’t be there or anything like that or If I need more advanced camera skills. When I am traveling for personal reasons, like let’s say when I go on vacation with my partner, then yes, he will actually take all the footage of me. But luckily on those type of trips actually I don’t do as much content as I could do so I try to also respect the fact that this is not a work trip, that this is a private trip so we don’t do crazy amounts of footage but we do manage to get some done and he’s actually very helpful in that way. Plus he became really good at taking pictures of me, I must say. It’s really worth training your partner because when he started he wasn’t actually that good. But now I must say, some of the best pictures I have of me he has taken. So just a little tip if you have a partner that you feel like you need to train. There is hope for all of you ladies. 

Q: How to deal with being ghosted. What’s the right attitude to have when they come back with excuses?

A: I need to really tell you how I feel about it because there are more and more men who are ghosting and who just follow their own pipe type of thing. And I do not support that because that is not okay. I don’t think that that is showing respect to a woman. Like in a situation like this I would just not accept any excuses. I would be like, “Uh-uh, sorry, this ship has sailed.” And to be honest, I really think it’s important to be a bit harsh. I mean it of course depends on situations. Sometimes an excuse might be actually valid. So we have to be a little bit flexible but not too flexible. I don’t think people who ghost you deserve really second chances unless they have a legitimate reason for that. So I would just start really setting boundaries because that’s how you educate them and that’s also how you raise your own value in the man’s eye. 

Q: Is the Cartier Love jewelry still classy? I see it on IG a lot.

A: Indeed. The Cartier Love bracelet, it’s one of those that you really do see everywhere on both men and women actually, but of course more on women. I would say it’s a very timeless piece so it’s not something that will ever go out of style. I don’t think it’s actually even in style. It’s just one of those jewelry that are very classic. Now, I do think that I wouldn’t personally buy it for myself because I just don’t think it’s that beautiful that I would personally buy it for myself. I got it from my partner as a sign for love so of course I wear it because it means something to me. I would say that if you get one as a gift, why not? But would I say that yes, you should try and acquire one because it gives you affluence or elegance? No, not really. I think there are other type of jewelry that you should go for instead. However, if you’re beloved gives to you then of course it’s so nice to wear it. 

Q: What’s something you changed that changed your life other than mindset?

A: Well, that would definitely be when I relocated countries. So whether it was that I left Sweden and began my journey in Italy, that definitely changed my life. Or when I decided to move back to UK, that also changed my life. So many travels that I did changed my life. So many relocations that I did changed my life. And that’s also why I was doing it so much because it just put me out of my comfort zone to the point that I was living life more to the full and to the max instead of just staying in my safe zone and life kind of didn’t change much as a result. That is definitely something that I do recommend. Try and explore the world as much as you can and also try and really get outside of your comfort zone in terms of physically actually. Your life is going to accelerate then and I feel like that’s when it really changes.

Next question and this one is funny…

Q: How do you feel about a woman paying for dinner for her partner when it’s his birthday?

A: And you know why I am laughing? Is because paying for a man … I almost feel like poor man. It’s almost like so de-masculating to him that it’s actually mean to pay for a man. Why I also started laughing like I got this image of this man sitting like a little boy for his birthday and then the woman is like his mom and paying for him. You see what I mean? It just is weird. I would not do this to my man. 

Q: What do you do when you get bored of your clothes? Do you throw away or give them away?

A: Actually I save a lot of my clothes since they are very timeless and I am also giving some away. So it’s a bit of a mix. I don’t throw anything away. If I give away, it will be to charity shops or people that I know as an example. But I do also save a lot of clothes for the future because I know a lot of the clothes can be reused or maybe one day, maybe my audience wants to take part of all the clothes that I don’t use so maybe I’ll do something with that in the future. But I still haven’t decided though so that’s why I actually save them until I decide.

Q: How etiquette rules are different through the years from the Victorian era to now for example?

A: You know what, this is why I tell you all the time that I teach modern elegance. So I have a whole module on etiquette in my program, Secrets of the Elite Woman. And actually there I do share to my students that I am going to teach you now the essential etiquette for you to look representable, be able to even dine with the queen. I will teach you the most formal table manners. And of course some other things such as deportment, et cetera. Now, why do I do that? Because etiquette is one of those topics that you can really go so deep on. And to some degree I feel like etiquette today is actually not so applicable anymore. There’s so many etiquette rules that people just don’t use in reality. That’s why it has changed a lot since the Victorian era. It has changed also in recent years I would say. Even like in the last 50 years it has changed a lot. But what is important to understand is that you know how formal etiquette works. Especially formal dining etiquette. 

Because let’s say you are in a situation where you have to dine with the queen or you are invited to a very important function. Maybe you work with diplomats. Maybe you are a diplomat or something like that where you really have to know the very top level dining etiquette. So then you would as an example sit like Kate Middleton sits in most of her pictures or you have to eat in a specific way with your cutlery which I teach in my program. Things like that. Like it’s really good that you have this knowledge and it’s really good that you try and practice this as much as possible even in situations when you’re not dining with the queen. Like when you are just kind of with your affluent friends are something like that. However, we still also have to be realistic and look around in our society. Even when you are with very affluent people and elite social circles you will see that actually first of all, a lot of people don’t really know how to eat in the most formal way. So etiquette and dining etiquette is actually quite more relaxed than we think. A lot of rich people don’t know how to eat properly, believe it or not. And I see it everywhere. Everywhere I go. 

Because obviously now since I’ve had the formal training when I went to the Swiss finishing school it almost becomes impossible for me to dine with people and not notice all the etiquette mistakes, which is a bit of a negative thing of getting this type of training. However, I just really want to paint the picture for you of reality. Learn essential etiquette which is what I cover in my trainings. I would say the rest only go deeper if you’re just interested in etiquette. You just want to kind of learn for fun, then do that. But to survive in high society, et cetera, you really don’t need to know more than certain things. So that’s kind of what I think. Maybe I went a little off topic there but I just think it’s really important to be aware and not to stress yourself too much of, let’s say, learning the correct afternoon tea etiquette when actually many people don’t really eat afternoon tea like that. Let’s put it this way. 

I’m kind of going to leave you on that note. Today we actually have good weather in Turkey so I’m going now to continue my workday. It’s morning here right now. We are here on a work trip as I told you and we have loads and loads of things to actually get through. I know it looks all glamorous with the travel and being in a sunny country but actually when you are on a work trip, believe it or not, there’s so much work behind the scenes that people don’t think about because people just see what you see on Instagram. However, that doesn’t mean that I’m not grateful for the beautiful views and the beautiful weather and being able to be in such amazing location as here. But just as a little reminder ladies, think about that life is three dimensional. It’s not black and white. There’s always more context around everything. So keep that in mind. Especially in our social media climate where everything looks so picture perfect all the time because what people show is the best parts of their day. They don’t necessarily show when they work really hard or when they’re having a sad moment or anything like that. They show the best of their days so think about that ladies. 


Now, I am going to talk to you next Wednesday so I look forward to that. And until then, have a beautiful week ahead. 


Anna Bey is hosting a FREE Workshop! 

“10 Brutal Mistakes That Show You’re Not Elegant – And How To Fix Them!” 

Join this brand new – For a limited time only! – workshop by visiting 

https://10elegancemistakes.com to claim your spot! 

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Anna Bey is an educator in the elegant feminine empowerment space and the founder of an online finishing school for women. She can confidently call herself a pioneer in this genre because she was the first to be sharing content in this niche since 2012.

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Anna Bey is an expert on Modern Elegance™, upscale transformations, and leveling up, with over 150 million channel views. Since 2012, she has taught women how to develop a more refined personal presence and lifestyle inside the Anna Bey Academy, where she hosts her various classes and courses. Her publication features include The Times UK, Newsweek, New York Post, Cosmopolitan, and many more.

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