First dates can be both exciting but also may be a little bit nerve-wracking. One of the keys to a successful first date is to have interesting and engaging conversation topics to keep the conversation flowing nicely throughout the time you’re spending with each other.

But be careful, ladies!

Certain topics should be avoided on a first date, as they can be awkward, uncomfortable, or even offensive.

So let’s be clever in our conversational skills, and avoid these topics until you are much more involved with the other person.

Exes

Talking about your exes on a first date is a major no-no. Not only can it make your date feel uncomfortable or jealous, but it can also give the impression that you’re bitter, or not still not over your previous relationship. Save the ex-talk for much later – if it must be brought up at all.

Politics

This is just not a good first-date topic!  Politics can be divisive and controversial, and you don’t want to talk about any topics that could become heated or unpleasant. Unless you are 100% sure that your date feels exactly the same way that you do and with the same degree of intensity, give politics a pass.

Religion

Religion is another sensitive topic that should be avoided on a first date. Like politics, it can be divisive and controversial. Additionally, religion can be a very personal and private matter, so it’s best to wait until you know your date better before discussing it.

Money

Money is a personal subject and not one that should be discussed on a first date. Talking about your salary, expenses, or financial problems can make your date feel uncomfortable or judged. It’s best to focus on getting to know each other quite well first before mentioning any financial matters.

Marriage and children

While it’s important to know what you want in the future, talking about marriage and children on a first date can be too much. It can make your date feel pressured or uncomfortable, and it can also give the impression that you’re too focused on the  future before you’ve even gotten to know each other. If you have a child of course it is fine to mention your own child casually.

Health problems

Other than minor health issues that are relevant to the date (food allergy, mobility needs if you’re a wheelchair user) discussing them on a first date is not appropriate. It can make your date feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed, and it can also give the impression that you’re looking for sympathy or pity. If you have serious physical or mental health problems, mention them when you’re  better acquainted.

Sex

Sex is a very personal and private matter, and it’s not something that should be discussed on a first date. Bringing up sex can make your date feel uncomfortable or objectified, and it can also give the impression that you’re only interested in a physical relationship, or worse, that this is all you are offering in a relationship. It’s best to wait until you know each other better before discussing sex. 

Negative topics 

Avoid bringing up negative topics on a first date, such as past traumas or current problems. These are very strange date night topics, as they can make your date feel uncomfortable, and gives the impression that you’re not a positive person. Instead, focus on positive and uplifting topics that will help you both have a good time. 

Controversial topics 

Controversial topics, such as abortion, gun control, or LGBTQ+ rights, should be avoided on a first date. These topics are firmly in the divisive and confrontational category, hence they can also reveal fundamental differences in your beliefs and values. If a controversial topic must be touched upon, keep the conversation respectful and non-judgmental. 

Work 

Talking about work on a first date can be boring or intimidating. It’s best to focus on getting to know each other as people rather than as LinkedIn profiles. This is not a work event! If you must talk about work, keep the conversation light and non-competitive, focusing on you as a woman on a date, and not as an employee or entrepreneur. 

With these tips, you’ll be on your way to smooth conversations and enjoy socializing with your date! And if you would like to learn more about how to be an elegant woman join my brand new workshop below!